About four or five years after Alison died, an inner restlessness of wanting to do something more took root. I yearned to create something that would both feed my soul and serve others in a tangible way. I had no idea what it was. Grrr….curious, I tossed around idea after idea. Some seemed somewhat feasible and captured my imagination for more than a day, others were written off almost as quickly as they popped into my head. The only one to find any fertile ground was creating a bed and breakfast of sorts exclusively for bereaved parents where they could come to get away for a weekend of peace and respite. I loved the concept, but for a variety of reasons, it still wasn’t THE ONE.
Getting curious about the future was both frustrating and one of juiciest times for me. Frustrating because it lasted entirely too long. In fact, gaining clarity took several years before I knew it was time to take action.
Eventually I gave up trying to figure it out. I was discouraged, nothing I came up with really clicked and I realized I was living more for the dream of something in the future than appreciating life in the moment. So I surrendered the striving and living for the future. Then the magic began. More on that next time…
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This is the eighteenth installment in a series of articles based on, “Good Grief – Embracing Life and Giving Good Support” a talk I gave on May 22, 2019. You can get caught up by starting with the introductory article here.