In a recent blog post I shared the story of a seemingly normal afternoon that ended up catapulting me into a different life trajectory. What made that normal afternoon different than any other? Was it some external event that necessitated change? Nope, it was me being fully present in the moment.
The seismic shift started with an innocent text from a friend. He said he was dropping everything and leaving. Instead of laughing it off and wishing him luck, I felt jealousy. It was in this moment I had a choice. Ignore the jealousy and get on with my day OR remain completely present. Choosing the latter, I asked myself what I was jealous of, what was I envisioning?
One of the first steps to being present is awareness of your emotions. Do you know how you feel right now? Would you be willing to take a moment and figure it out? Are you happy, content, frustrated, confused, worried about the long to do list you’re ignoring while reading this post and doing this exercise?
When I first tried this exercise I was surprised at how difficult it was for me to identify my feelings. I’d been unconsciously walking around numb for so long. I get why I’d defaulted to the seemingly safe space of numbness. I’d gone through so much heartbreak and pain over the years that not feeling, or more correctly, not allowing myself to touch the feelings got me through some pretty rough days in the beginning.
But at some point this numbness no longer served me. It was not only insulating me from pain and heartbreak, it was also keeping me from joy, connection, and vibrancy. My first step back into being fully present in my life was the simple, yet sometimes difficult practice of awareness of my emotions. Just for today can you pause every couple of hours, checking in with yourself to see how you feel?
This is such a powerful practice because when you know how you actually feel in the present you can start impacting your future present moments. Next blog post I’ll share what I was envisioning and how I combined being fully in the present while dreaming of and being intentional about the future.
Rather watch than read? You can also check out and subscribe to my YouTube channel! This is a quick video describing how to check in on your current feelings.